Thursday, November 11, 2010

Greetings..

Very Hilarious..
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Our heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send us "forwards" over the past 12 months.

Thank you for making us feel safe, secure, blessed and healthy.  Extra thanks to whoever sent us the email about rat crap in the glue on envelopes - cause we now have to go get a wet towel every time we need to seal an envelope.

Also, we scrub the top of every can we open for the same reason.

Because of your genuine concern, we no longer drink Coca Cola because we know it can remove toilet stains, which is not very appealing.

We no longer check the coin return on pay phones because we could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

We no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though we smell like a wombat on a hot day.

We no longer go to the shopping centre because someone might drug us with a perfume sample and rob us.

We no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

We no longer worry about our souls because at last count, we have 363,214 angels looking out for us.

Thanks to you, we have learned that God only answers our prayers if we forward an email to seven of our friends and make a wish within five minutes.

We no longer have any savings because we gave it to a sick girl on the Internet who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

We no longer have any money at all in fact - but that will change once we receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending us for participating in their special on-line email program.

We want to thank you all so much for looking out for us that we will now return the favour!

If you don't send this email to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhoea will land on your head at 8:00 tonight.

We know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of our next door neighbour's ex-mother-in- law's second husband's cousin's hairdresser.

DO IT NOW OR ELSE.

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